Abandonment

You, long my nemesis and hater of my soul.
You’ve chilled my days and frozen all my long night’s coal
in hours of stark terror and silent desperate screams
on razor blades I’ve laid my stricken threatened head
thanks to your dark malevolent deadly ways…

abandonment.

You poisoner of my rivers flowing pure and oh so sweet,
you making dry my innocent new merry bubbling spring
and striking terror in my tender childlike heart
with zombie screams so savage, oh so hungry shrill,
and yet so silent and so baleful still
you emanate such evil dread and blackness toward me
and I am melted in my soul aghast,

abandoned.

Long have I searched and sought an exit, for the way
that leads me from your cruel torture chambers dark
un-swaddles me from all your reeking death clothes stark
and dank and damp and dripping with death’s poisonous remark,
slowly I turn my shivering and jittery back on you
while terror talks and walks straight up my frigid spine
and every vertebrae recoils in mortal fear
you creep pernicious up my frame like poison vine
but I am resolute because I want to gain
my freedom from your bottomless black empty jailer eyes
and rows of terrible sharp executioner teeth
and so it’s me, at last, it’s me that does you right…

I
abandon
you.

you horror,
you absolute
horror.

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7 thoughts on “Abandonment

    • Abandonment has been identified in the hard crucible of therapy as the chief demon that has tormented me.

      that is my first attempt at confronting it

      honestly, therapy sux right now

      • I’m sure it’s very hard. And you are at that part of the journey where you are losing a few. Maybe more than a few and it really does suck a lot. I’m so sorry.

  1. Ah, my friend. That resonates in my soul so much. Thank you for sharing it. Take courage to continue standing against this “abandonment”. I’m with you as are others. You not alone. You not abandoned. Hang in there, brave and noble one. You are the warrior with your words that cut sharp and bold into the enemy ranks, and wound him brutally to bring him to his knees. I love your work so very much. Thank you for sharing it. It is so powerful and moving.

  2. Pingback: Abandonment | Charissa's Grace Notes

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