Born under the sign of Cancer

tumblr_n8azbvFheR1tg1040o1_500ok…so this is definitely me.

I am learning to not do this so much?  But I developed a bluff of laughter and self deprecation…and never let them see you hurt…ever.  I remember in middle school…there was this group of 3 girls that I so desperately wanted to be friends with…so I plucked up my courage and began to befriend them…Cindy, Trina, and Maureen.  I actually thought we were making great progress, and for about 3 weeks I freaking loved going to school each day.  This was the 7th grade, by the way.

One morning I was looking for them in the halls early, and came up on them from around a corner, and was behind them.  I was about to call out when I heard my name being mentioned and I sorta froze?  And heard this:  “yeah, and I can’t believe that stupid jerk thinks we like him!”  Laughter then ensued in gales around them and I turned on my heel and went the other way, face of stone, heart of rubble and soul awash in sorrow.

I don’t believe I ever spoke to any of them again.

sigh…probably not the greatest quality to have, right?

But hey…I am still growing, learning to come out of the rocky crevices and join the rest of the human race!

thanks for giving me a safe harbor.

Love, Charissa

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4 thoughts on “Born under the sign of Cancer

  1. It takes times. We are who we are and sometimes we have to figure out how to work with that. Your instinct is to protect yourself- very natural.

    7th grade is an awful age to be!!! I swear nothing good ever happens in 7th grade.

  2. Oh gosh, 7th grade!! A nightmare for most, I’d say…

    You are finally stepping into the You you’ve always been. And it’s a beautiful thing to behold (even from afar in space. But not heart. Never heart).

    BTW: Cancer??
    SO true.

    • Giggle…yes…you would know us Cancers! lol…

      thanks Dani…the part you play has been a wonder to behold…to step out where there was only air and yawning space before and find purchase and ground upon which to walk…well it amazes and delights

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