Twilight In Lavender

Your love was inside me
rising, falling, sweeping in over
my dry beaches, rushing out into
my far reaches…

and your arms were all about me
like spring clouds soft and grey
and fat with rain milked from
fountains of the morning dew.

I woke, and there was nothing,
nothing but you…you in my heart,
in my thoughts, you like tides
in my veins.Image result for you like tides in my veins
Here’s what clashes inside me,
like tides and beaches under skies,

clanging loud and clear against crags
midst thunder and silky lightening:

I used to have everything anyone said
was required to be happy and content and yet
I was in despair
for there was nothing of me inside and yet
somehow I was there,
a mute witness to the horror of myself and full
of one long interminable silent scream…
tumblr_nlw1naPDJh1sd2kbko1_1280And now?  Now I have lost it all
(except you, dearest one)
and yet gained myself within
and thus find joy unspeakable
midst this storm of tears,

clash of times and loss
of all (even my fears)
and utter failure…

Now I sit in deserts dry
(no oasis in this barren land,
that oasis is become me),
I sit still midst salt and sand

and snakes and smile, because I am
become a meadow here inside,

and poppies dance beneath the breeze
and sway in purple twilight ways,
in this velvet twilight, mmmmm
this twilight in lavenderImage 006

Everything we see hides another thing,
we always want to see what is hidden by what we see.
There is an interest in that which is hidden
and which the visible does not show us.
This interest can take the form
of a quite intense feeling, a sort of conflict, one might say,
between the visible that is hidden and the visible that is present.
René Magritte, speaking about his piece, “The Son of Man”

tumblr_nidq45pbdB1r59mkyo1_1280

7 thoughts on “Twilight In Lavender

    • and since you look closely…did you notice the waves coming in, going out…stanza by stanza and in stanzas as well?? 😉

      Sorry…hadda point that out cus likely no one would notice the mechanics of that.

      *Charissa indulges a minor sin of preening*

  1. “I used to have everything anyone said
    was required to be happy and content and yet
    I was in despair
    for there was nothing of me inside and yet
    somehow I was there,”

    *sharp inhale*

    • (you left off the next line, that really sets that phrase in perspective)

      … “a mute witness to the horror of myself and full
      of one long interminable silent scream…” …

      the scream has ceased, and in my heart there rings a melody

      and the rest of the poem is yes. is amen.

      I take for myself the Name “Oasis”.
      I name Myself “Meadow” inside.
      This is an existential action of tremendous significance to me.

      I wonder if you thought much about the quote, what it says, why I chose it? How it interprets what I wrote?

  2. Pingback: Shaking And Trembling And Speechless | Charissa's Grace Notes

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