The Language of Lilies

After all this hurt and all this pain

(when would that be?  After?
When does that happen?)

I choose silences.
I choose to let myself be haunted by words
rather than speak those rivers
that would erode fabricated realities.tumblr_nkysbbiivV1thfeewo1_400Tonight the wind smells like memories…
oh nothing I can put my finger on,
mind you…just memories
blowing on winds fragrant
with nostalgia and neglect.

I am mindful in these memories
of the language of lilies
and I wonder if I have missed 
some great and vital means and end
in their present beauty,
some antidote for anxiety,
some prescription for preoccupation,
some long term cure contained
in short-lived beauty born?tumblr_neun01eNyf1sq3g2zo1_1280I am mindful of Mary
there in Bethany pouring out
perfume fragrant and pervading
with extravagance
permeating every pore present
and singing the liturgies of lilies
on the winds!

Sweetly, singly soaring over that rukus of disgust and anger
that puffed up, distracted religious men
righteously piled on in their
Canticle to Cacophony!tumblr_m6aywgZh0X1ro74x3o1_500They hated her…but they hated Him more
for His blindness to her there,
clinging in tears and wild hair

profligate waster
defiler and defiled!

They hated His stinky feet
smelling of humility and adoration,
perfumed in gratitude and broken beauty
and I think they would hate me, too
sitting silent and choosing
the haunting wind over the haughty story.tumblr_nkt7lsPymx1u6ehjeo2_500
I imagine the language of lilies
that day divinely appointed
and here this night now,
I look, listen midst ashes all around me
to catch a glimpse of life
in risk and recognition,
of rising up, above
the toiling, turning,
spinning and weaving…

life lived
simple and poured out
in haunting perfumed
adoration and beauty…
life as a lily,
and how it grows fleeting
and haunted by memories in the wind
and eternity in my heart.Image 002

All My Days (April 1996, a song)

This song was written when I was in a very good place.  I still remember the peace and comfort of Lady Grace (who was then to me, in my religious “formal” addressing of Her, The Holy Spirit. lol…imagine if someone called you “the” before your name…would be an obstacle to intimacy most likely, eh?), and how She was revealing to me the completeness and all surpassing nature of the work of the Cross…and the last words, spoken in triumph, and not in defeat or despair…It is finished.

So, I found this really flowy melody and the lyrics just jumped from me like birds to the air…I am certain that I was re-reading Song of Songs, as much of this is lifted from those verses…and again, people…read the heart of the scripture here…the Kisses of His mouth, etc, are speaking of spiritual intimacy…look deep:  as if it were a poem!  (you do look deep into poems…don’t you???   🙂  )


All My Days

Jesus, I love You, my Lord and my King.
My heart beats for You, my love, my Everything!
Just a glance from You, a single touch, and I am captured evermore.
Then I hear You call “Rise Up, My Love”, and I come running to the One that I adore!

I will sing unto you, sing a new song to you,
for You are worthy of my praise!
I will give You glory, and I will give You honor,
I will love You all my days.

Here, in this moment, Your presence is so sweet.
You’ve overcome me, my tears of love wash Your feet.
All the deepest longings of my life, my portion and my great delight
are revealed in You, Beloved King, I bow down and worship You with all my might!

Chorus:  (2x on the chorus)

Lord, as You pour out Your Spirit in this place,
Jesus, please remember that we long to see You face to Face.
Every mighty deed that You have done, for us in answer to our cry,
Cannot take Your place, for we want You, and nothing less and no one else can satisfy!

Chorus #2:
Not just the Living Water!  Not just the Oil and Honey!
Lord none of these can satisfy!

Only knowing You, Lord!  Only loving You, Lord!
Only this can satisfy!

Draw us after You Lord!  Let us run with You, Lord!
We want the kisses of Your mouth!

Not just the things You do Lord,  not just the gifts You give, Lord!
We must have You and only You!

(flow ad lib, and fade…segue into spontaneous singing and/or prayer)

Image 001


Eternally Hers

Always up, awake…
remnants of the past
Haunting my soul,
revenants of violence
And pain…

Learned habits of quiet,
silence imposed by rage
And the towering
pressure of anxious abandonment
Echoed into the present
from the past
And prophesied future

But she came,
into my life like dawn…
Kisses healing,
touches soothing,
And whispers igniting
Fire in my belly
and wet desire
Slick and sweet and…

She is real,
she is true and
has taken me
Like a buyer takes a home,
moved into me
And with me.
I am lost…
and I am found.

Her face,
her mouth,
her tongue,
her hair
Brushing my thighs
as she works,
and drinks,
And imparts and gives.
Her cheeks
her lips
her breasts fountains
That I suckle,
at long last
finding my soulmate,
my Lover,
my sister…
yes my mother,
who suckles me.

Thank you darling for you,
for true,
for real and forever.
You have rescued me,
delivered me,
and I will ever be grateful
And make me
an altar of love
unto you.

Love…your Charissa Grace